What does coying mean?
"Coying" is the present participle of the verb "coy," describing behavior that is affectedly shy, modest, or playfully evasive — typically when someone dodges a question, flirts without committing, or teases rather than speaking plainly. A person who is coying may smile, deflect, and hint while withholding a direct answer, and the word can carry either a light, flirtatious connotation or a mildly critical one suggesting insincerity or manipulation. In everyday speech the form is rare; most people use the adjective "coy" instead, saying that someone "is being coy" rather than that they are "coying." When it does appear, it lends a slightly literary or old-fashioned tone to descriptions of courtship, diplomacy, or evasion. Care should be taken not to confuse "coying" with the visually similar but unrelated "cloying," which describes something disgustingly sweet or overdone. The word derives from "coy," which traces back through Old French "coi" (quiet, still) to Latin "quietus," meaning calm or at rest.
verb (present participle of "coy")The act of behaving in a coy manner — being affectedly shy, modest, or reluctant, often playfully or flirtatiously — or of making someone else do so.
- Behaving in an affectedly shy, modest, or flirtatiously evasive way; dallying or prevaricating rather than giving a straight answer.
"She was still coying about the question, laughing but never quite answering it."
"He kept coying with the reporters, smiling slyly but revealing nothing."
"Stop coying and just tell me whether you'll come to the wedding."
Don't let the spelling trip you: one letter separates this shy little word from "cloying" — and they mean almost opposite things.
Reviewed by Deb Chak, Editor. AI-assisted content curated by RJS Tech Solutions LLP.
Etymology of coying
"Coying" derives from the verb "coy," formed from the adjective "coy," which entered Middle English from Old French "coi," meaning quiet, still, or modest. The Old French term ultimately descends from Latin "quietus," meaning calm or at rest, the same root behind English words like "quiet" and "composure." Over time, "coy" shifted from denoting quiet modesty to its modern sense of prettily affected shyness or evasiveness, and the verbal form "to coy" — and hence "coying" — emerged to describe such behavior.
Related word forms
How coying is actually used
"Coying" is uncommon; speakers far more often use the adjective "coy" or the phrase "being coy." The verbal form carries a slightly literary flavor and can sound dated or affected. It should not be confused with the much more frequent "cloying."
Easily confused with coying
"Cloying" describes something sickeningly sweet or excessive, while "coying" is the rare verbal form of "coy," meaning acting shy or evasively playful.